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When I was invited to travel to New Zealand in 2003 to talk with
a client’s mother and write her memoirs, I felt extremely
privileged and very excited. My subject, a thoroughly engaging
ex-Liverpudlian, had endured a lonely childhood surrounded by stern
adults in an austere environment, with the added trauma of being a
wartime evacuee. She fell pregnant, married young and commenced
“living with the in-laws in cramped conditions with no hot water
and a bath that hung on the wall.” A few years later, eager to
escape the post-war doldrums and dreary English winters, she and
her husband made a momentous decision to begin a new life on the
other side of the world. So in 1953, struggling with two small
children plus another on the way, they subsequently undertook the
long sea voyage to far off New Zealand, heads and hearts full of
hopes and dreams.
The Value of Sharing your Personal Story
I grew up in New Zealand and when we were kids we used to
celebrate Guy Fawkes Night with a huge bonfire and the usual
selection of fireworks. What I remember most though, is that after
the noise had faded and the fire dimmed, all the children gathered
around with hot mugs of cocoa and listened to stories told to us by
the adults. And during the years since, whether in the outback of
Australia, the SaharaDesert, or even in the Scottish Highlands in a
caravan, there have been many times when people’s stories have held
me spellbound.
As human beings, we are fascinated by other people’s lives, as
evidenced by all the reality television shows and racks full of
“tell-all” magazines. Clearly, as the result of their life
experiences, relationships with others and the world around them,
everyone has their own unique stories to tell. And it is by sharing
those personal stories that we enrich the lives of others, who may
be able to relate to our triumphs, struggles and
difficulties.
How many times have you heard people say: “I wish I’d remembered to
ask my grandmother more about her life” or “I wonder what life was
like for my grandparents when they first arrived in
Australia?”
Imagine the 95 year old who rode to school in a horse and buggy,
experienced the first electric light and has lived through two
World Wars. There is so much valuable personal history woven into
long and eventful lives which should be shared and cherished by
other family members. And we all want to be remembered, both for
the good we've done and for the significant accomplishments in our
lives.
There is satisfaction in a life well-lived – and remembered.
What to include in your story
You don’t necessarily have to record your complete life story in
chronological order and in fact you may prefer to focus on a
particular period or event. For example, someone who has excelled
in motor car racing or another sport may simply wish to record
those experiences. Or perhaps a family member who has recovered
from a life-threatening illness may want to share their story to
help others.
In particular, I often hear children of the early Australian
immigrants say that they wish they had taken the trouble to record
their family history. And I’m sure that from time to time we’ve all
been subjected to a few stories from keen ex-military personnel who
are just bursting to share their war-time experiences with us!
The process of writing your story
There are no hard and fast rules as to how you tell your life
story because that’s all part of your individual experience. And,
personally, I like to create a different style for every family
memoir I write. During a flight back to Melbourne from interviewing
a New Zealand woman in 2003, I considered how I might present her
story. Rather than just do a predictable historical walk-through, I
decided to ‘break the journey’ into what I felt were interesting
chunks of information. This meant considerable re-organizing of
material once it was transcribed, and this editing proved to be a
very lengthy process. Ultimately, however, I felt that future
readers would find the stories more interesting and
entertaining.
You may be keen to tell your own life-story, so of course it would
be a good idea to keep a diary or journal where you can record
events as they happen. There are also many journalling and
memoir-writing courses available. As always, I believe that
motivation is the key!
If you decide not to write your story yourself, I would suggest
employing a biographical writer who will probably need to interview
you. This is a very intimate process, requiring sensitivity on the
part of the interviewer. Personally, I have found the interview
process to be both exhilarating and exhausting, possessing
therapeutic as well as stressful elements. I conduct my interviews
using a tape recorder and maintain a strict two-hour time schedule,
preferring to interview people in their own surroundings to help
them relax. I have found that in most cases a natural closeness
develops with the interviewee, and this facilitates a more
authentic memoir. Little nuances of speech, grammatical expressions
and so on become an integral part of the final written
work.
The finished product
Nowadays, with digital printing technology, it is possible to
produce a very professional and attractive book for a reasonable
cost. In most cases, I have found the client will want to print a
limited number of books to give as gifts to family members. Of
course, should you so aspire, it is also possible preserve your
legacy with an elegant, leather-bound finish. Back
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